This sketch by Louis CK rang true on so many levels. One of the sketches is about how his daughter would play Hide & Seek by simply crouching near a wall. Like a good Dad, he would pretend not to know where she was while ‘finding’ her. We have had a similar experience with Aiden, who likes to yell out “Here I am” as soon as we come to find him. He’s so enthusiastic about it though, so it’s hard not to just love him for it.
Kids don’t always seem to get that their games are lame.
One such game that Aiden recently made up involves his submarine in the bath. During one bath, he asked me “What’s coming out of the water?” and I presented not to know it was his submarine. I guessed some other thing that goes in the water. He thought it was hilarious. Unfortunately, he insisted we repeat the experiment over and over again. For many days. So, I have to pretend that I have no idea what is coming out of the water, over and over again, always suggesting some sort of boat or aquatic life. I am not allowed to deviate from these ‘rules’ or he will correct me. I act surprised each time: “Submarine!” I need to exclaim.
What kinds of games have your kids come up with that you think are stupid?
Aiden is potty trained!! I’m glad to report, it was really easy too. Though Aiden first showed an interest in potty training at 28 months when one of his best friends was potty training, his body wasn’t quite ready for it. His bladder capacity then was only about an hour, he could still have accidents even right after a success, and he began to fear the potty for the ‘other’ reason. So, we backed off. It was a hard decision at the time, but I’m glad that’s what we did (for him and for the pregnant / postpartum period for me).
Big boy underwear
About a week and half ago, he asked again to start wearing underwear after he had a big success on the potty. He’d been going pee on the potty on and off for a while (particularly at preschool, where they have 2 scheduled breaks), but we didn’t think he was ready for the ‘other’ part – both emotionally and physically he was having issues.
I’m glad to say, my fears over that are gone. We gave him lots of bran for the first week (new cereal made it interesting for him again) and I’d say he’s even more regular now, even without the bran. It’s possible he’s properly listening to his body now, which is interesting. We’ll see how that progresses.
As far as the potty training method, it wasn’t hard. He already had the skills from our previous attempt, it was more about understanding what his body was telling him and actually being willing to listen to it. He resisted the latter part for 2 days, having a few accidents, but then has been nearly accident free since then. He’s only had 2 accidents from not listening to his body’s cues and no accidents aside from that for a whole week – yay!
We gave Aiden candy for his successes until the bowl of it ran out. He forgot we had candy when we were out of the house and I didn’t take any to Victoria – that has mostly nipped the candy-request to a minimum. I gave Aiden a new book after 3 days of no accidents and that was a great motivator for him to stay dry – he was really looking forward to his present.
I know that potty training kind of snuck up on us once again (I was planning on waiting until Damien could sit), but I am beyond proud of Aiden. He has done SO well in mastering this new skill and in listening to his body, even when he really doesn’t want to stop what he’s doing. I think the fact that we could take him on vacation just one week into potty training was really quite amazing.
The bonus of Aiden being closer to 3 is definitely the improvement in undressing skills, the ability to hold himself on the toilet, the lack of fear of public toilets and a reduced fear in the whole process. He’s even able to nap (when he does nap) and not have accidents!
Damien is about 3.5 months old right now. It seems like he’s been in our lives for a very long time, but it’s not very long at all. My experience as a mother the first time around has been very different this time. Thanks in part to less hectic hormones, better milk supply and more sleep, I’m feeling great! I don’t have postpartum depression this time around and feel like I’m handling things – and even enjoying them. Of course, I usually hit a slump in the late afternoon when I a) need more coffee and b) really just need some down time.
(Aiden / Damien)
When I look back and compare my life at 3.5 months with Aiden and how it is now, it’s like comparing apples to oranges.
Aiden: waking up every 45mins – 2 hours all night.
Damien: sleeps 13 hours with 1 dreamfeed before I go to sleep.
Aiden: going out multiple times a day, napping Aiden in a jiggle motion for his 20-minute catnaps. Went out to lunch, coffee and breastfeeding support groups.
Damien: Go to Aiden’s playgroups, parks, coffee and sometimes lunch
Aiden: lots of walks for naps, mostly with the Ergo. Wouldn’t sleep in the Ergo if we were indoors.
Damien: walking not easy with 2, so he’s jiggled to sleep in the Ergo wherever we are.
Aiden: would only nap at home if nursed to sleep. Was a huge struggle.
Damien: prefers to sleep at home in his crib. Sleep is max 43 mins though.
Aiden: still developing relationships with other moms
Damien: have fantastic and supportive mom friends, many of whom also have 2nd children by now
Aiden: constant attention at home, library time, song groups, reading time several times a day
Damien: often just held while talking with Aiden, no specific groups of his own, his ‘reading’ time is when I read to Aiden
Aiden: no time to do anything, so bogged down by co-sleeping
Damien: back to working part time by 3 weeks, blogging here, going on date nights
To back all that up, there’s the obvious difference in our parenting: we know more and are far more confident. Although Damien is not a super laid-back baby, compared to some, he’s far more laid back than Aiden at this age (thanks to sleep!).
For about two months, Aiden has been calling me “Ma-y” or “Mah-y” most of the time. If you’re trying to imagine how that sounds, imagine “Mommy” but without the M’s and with a slightly more “a” sound, like Ma. When said quickly, it’s almost like he’s simply saying “My”. It’s odd.
I have always been Mommy to Aiden, though of course he knows and has experimented with all the variants. I’m not sure how I became “Ma-y”. He has been experimenting with language – breaking up words, making words up, etc – as is normal for a toddler, so perhaps that is it. Or perhaps he simply says “Mommy” so many times a day that he needed a shorter variant.
It caught us a little by surprise… Aiden wanted to begin potty training. We’ve had a lot of wonderful playdates with Jessica & Zayden during Spring Break and, perhaps unsurprisingly, Aiden wanted to be just like Zayden… who just began potty training. He got very upset one morning when he didn’t have underwear and had to wear his diaper instead.
Our “plan” was to put Aiden in his big boy bed this month then potty train during the summer; turns out, we were missing several key parts to convert Aiden’s crib (he’s upset about this almost every day) and the potty training wish came early. I wasn’t sure Aiden was ready, but how can you ever really know? Given he knows when he’s doing something in his diaper and his new desire to try, we figured we’d give it a go. I knew he had “most” of the signs.
After some emergency shopping for some big boy underwear and some cloth training underwear, we were set to begin. Our first day was mostly accidents. Once Aiden had a success and realized candy was involved? Well, that was a great incentive. He seems willing to go pee at the drop of a hat.
Aiden still has accidents, even at home, but he’s making progress. He’s not confident of his own ability to hold his bladder yet, though he did stay dry during his nap today (even with his diaper) and overflowed his night diaper (likely a big pee let go at once). He doesn’t completely void his bladder when he’s sitting either, which means he can have an accident even right after a success. But his skills are slowly developing.
Since nobody in this family enjoys staying at home, we’ve ventured out early. That’s just the reality of how we live. He goes out in his cloth trainers and is learning to ask to go pee when it’s time. He tends to need to be told to pee after one hour – his max point before he has a little accident. At least for now.
Being naked at home has helped Aiden be able to use the potty whenever he needs to – and it’s very often. It’s a fixture in the living room, at least for now.
We’re all VERY tired. Aiden has unfortunately been going through a bad sleep cycle, making us all more grumpy than is ideal in this situation. There have been a lot of tantrums in this house in the last 3 days.
We have, however, survived 3 days of potty training. It hasn’t been fun, but we are making progress and Aiden seems excited about that. Hopefully his bladder control catches up – I don’t want to back-track on potty training now that we’ve started, so I’m hoping his body catches up with his emotional readiness.
Wish us luck – I hope I’m not still reporting lots of accidents a few weeks from now!